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  #1 (permalink)  
Unread Aug 28th, 2016, 02:33 am
eslHQ Member
 
Join Date: Jun 1st, 2016
Posts: 28
alexlearner is on a distinguished road
Default Where are my grammar mistakes?

A few days ago, I made up some sentences and asked my native English speaking neighbour to check my grammar. He said that there were a few mistakes, but he did not explain what I did wrong. I am going to put them down next.

(ex) My tutoring company has decided to start a marketing team to increase our social media presence, and our first step is to create a Facebook page. Part of our plan on the Facebook page is to introduce our tutors; brief tutor introductions can enhance the center's personality while further strengthening our established credibility. We will be making cartoon images of everyone to cater to those who are uncomfortable with their pictures being on the Internet. In the next week or two, the marketing team will be taking pictures of everyone to transform into cartoons.

I like to make up sentences to practice my English grammar. I really cannot find any grammar mistakes in my sentences above. Please explain what I did wrong. Thank you very much for your help.
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  #2 (permalink)  
Unread Aug 28th, 2016, 03:11 am
Sue
 
Join Date: Oct 8th, 2006
Location: Milan
Posts: 1,400
susan53 is on a distinguished road
Default Re: Where are my grammar mistakes?

Not many really and they're more lexical than grammatical...

a) My tutoring company has decided to start a marketing team ...
Better : to set up a marketing team You start an action and also some organisations like companies, but set up or form a group of people.

b) Part of our plan on the Facebook page is to introduce our tutors...
The "plan" isn't on the FB page, so I'd change this to Part of our plan for this Facebook page is to use it introduce our tutors ... or even better : One of the things we intend to do on the Facebook page is to intriroduce our tutors...


c) brief tutor introductions can enhance the center's personality
A centre can't have a personality. Better : ... can enhance the center's image...

d) cartoon images : This makes it sound as if they'll be caricatures or funny drawings? Is this what you mean? It has a very negative connotation. I suspect you just mean drawings. Compare this caricature of Obama with this drawing

e) to cater to those : to cater for those...
Cater to can have the connotation of reluctance, of not really believing it should be done : Their father is a tyrant. They have to cater to his every whim.

f) uncomfortable with their pictures being on the Internet. But if you put drawings up, then these are also "pictures". Here, I think you mean "photos".

g) In the next week or two, the marketing team will be taking pictures - again "photos"

h) of everyone to transform into cartoons. Transform is a transitive verb so ...and will transform them into drawings. or ...into pictures.

Hope that helps.

Last edited by susan53 : Aug 28th, 2016 at 11:03 am.
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